I thought cutting off my brother after 9 years of silence was the healthy move, now I'm not so sure
I spent 9 years telling myself I was the good guy for walking away from my brother after he missed our mom's 70th birthday dinner in Denver. I had a whole speech ready about how I was setting a boundary, and I repeated it to anyone who would listen. Then in March my cousin sent me a photo from his wedding, and there was my brother in the back row, and he looked old and tired. It hit me that I had spent nearly a decade being proud of a choice that mostly just meant I lost my brother. I had confused holding a grudge with having self respect, and those are not the same thing at all. So now I'm wondering if anybody here has ever tried to reopen a door they slammed shut, and how you even start that conversation after so long.