My dad told me to cut off my best friend for being jealous, was he right?

My dad said my friend Sarah was jealous of my promotion and I should drop her. Six months later I found out she had been badmouthing me to our whole group. Has anyone gotten advice from family that actually turned out to be true?

3 comments

3 Comments

the_drew1mo ago

Saw a thing on social media about a study that said family members can pick up on toxic behavior in friends way before we do because they're not blinded by loyalty. That sounds like exactly what happened here. Your dad likely noticed little things about Sarah that you brushed off at the time. Six months of her badmouthing you is a long time, and that kind of jealousy usually shows up in small ways first. Did she ever get weird about your achievements before the promotion, or was this the first time?

the_max1mo ago

Trust me on this one @the_drew, I had the exact same wake-up call with my old college buddy Mike when I got a promotion he wanted. Looking back, my brother warned me about how Mike always downplayed my wins, but I just thought he was being a good friend keeping me humble.

phoenix_bailey1mo ago

Whoa hold up, I gotta push back on this one a bit. People talk about jealousy and badmouthing like it's always this clear cut thing, but sometimes a friend is just being honest and that gets confused with being toxic. Maybe your dad and brother were seeing things through their own protective lens, not necessarily the real truth of your friendship with Mike. Six months of badmouthing is a long time, sure, but it's also possible Mike was frustrated with something specific at work or in his own life and took it out the wrong way without being a full on jealous hater. I've had friends say stuff about me that stung, but turns out they were right about my blind spots and I was the one being too sensitive.