The simple trick that fixed my dialogue problem in 3 drafts

Tbh I used to write dialogue that sounded way too formal for normal people. My characters all talked like they were giving a speech. Then I tried reading everything out loud in my kitchen and it was a total mess. Anybody else notice how much difference it makes when you actually hear the words spoken?

3 comments

3 Comments

murray.cora1mo ago

Oh man, reading out loud is the real deal. I caught myself with this character who kept saying "I apologize for the inconvenience" and I was like nobody talks like that. My sister actually roasted me for making a teenager sound like a HR department. Now I write a line, whisper it to myself, and fix it if it feels stiff.

davidkim1mo ago

Haha yeah the whisper test is gold! @murray.cora I do the same thing now after I wrote a character that said "I require clarification" like a robot. My buddy was like "dude your 12 year old protagonist sounds like a lawyer." Now I whisper every line to myself and if it feels like something I'd never say to a friend, I rewrite it. The HR department line is brutal but true - teenagers don't talk like managers.

rileygarcia1mo ago

Do you ever catch yourself writing a character that sounds like they're reading off a script for a customer service training video? I did that with a scene where two friends were arguing and my character actually said "I understand your perspective" like it was a mediation session. My buddy looked at me and said "does this guy work at a call center or what?" The whisper test is the only thing that saved me from a whole novel full of people who sound like they're filing complaints with the Better Business Bureau.