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Am I the only one who thinks that sending the letter is better than keeping it locked away? | Lost and Found Letters - Free To Speak

the_olivia•2mo ago

Am I the only one who thinks that sending the letter is better than keeping it locked away?

I've been sitting on a letter to my old roommate from Austin for about 6 months now, the one where I finally called her out for stealing my $300 security deposit. Part of me thinks that sending it would just start a fight, but the other part feels like I'm letting her win by staying silent. I actually tried a compromise where I wrote a shorter version and mailed it last week, and honestly I feel 10 pounds lighter even if she never replies. Which side do you guys lean on - holding onto it for closure or sending it to get it off your chest?

3 comments

3 Comments

ivan7742mo ago

Six months is way too long to hold onto that, sending it was the right call.

caseythompson2mo ago

Honestly I'm on the other side of this one. Sending that letter opens a door you might not want to walk through again. Once it's out there you can't take it back, and people like that roommate will just use it as ammunition to play the victim or drag you into more drama. Six months means you already processed the anger and moved on with your life, so why hand her the power to disrupt that? The relief you feel right now could turn into regret if she decides to fire back with her own version of events or involve other people. Closure comes from deciding it's over, not from making sure she knows your side. Keeping it locked away means you control the story, not her.

ray_williams2mo ago

Read somewhere that holding onto resentment is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Sounds dramatic but there's truth to it. Your short version sounds smart, gets the point across without going full manifesto mode. Maybe try sitting on the feeling for another week before deciding.